Value something, not somebody

People who have gone through a lot of ups and downs would like to convey this concept to the young: value something, not somebody. When I was young, I used to put all my goals and plans on the girl I “loved”, for instance, I would choose the place where she is to go, and I would start to learn the things she likes. Nonetheless, that is not all. When we are in a relationship, we would tend to be over caring because we are afraid of losing, so some of us keep giving love without any valid feedback, only to find out that by putting all he wants/likes/needs on somebody, he has already risked losing all he had.

People change, and it is the truth. But it is not a bad thing. As intelligent creatures, we human beings have well adapted to the rule of nature – competition. No matter we are cooks, servers, coders, athletes or what, we compete against others to show we are valuable in this world. Some people would have already found what they love for the lifetime, but some people don’t. I happened to be one of them when I was young, so I used to rely the decision making on my girlfriend’s wills – whichever you choose, I will follow your path. While some of this type of stories would end up in good romance, most of them don’t. When your decision maker left, your entire system broke down. You feel like a zombie with no actual living purpose, crawling around searching for food.

Life is not like that, for sure. Something is always true, and that should be the things that we are after, that we should value. By finding those valuable things, such as good habits, good manners or morales, you will find your life unbreakable by anyone else, because those things won’t break. Some of us want to be a travel journalist because they want to show the world wonders that are undiscovered; some of us want to be a splendid cook because they like the smile when customers take a bite on the well-made food; some of us want to be coders because they love the simple idea that can change the whole world.

Those things don’t break, and we should value them instead of some individuals. Think about the time when we fall in love with somebody, we love them as a whole, not just their body. The abstract part of love is what we often ignore when the hormone effect hits. If you love to do something, keep the motivation, and if you still haven’t found one, go find it. Just don’t put your life’s blueprint on any individual, and if there has to be one, it got to be yourself.

Be your god, and love your world first before you can care others’.

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